The thing about peeing...

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West Virginia Mule
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The thing about peeing...

#1 Post by West Virginia Mule » 24 Jan 2010 14:37

The thing about peeing is this: I'm sick of it.

I mean, so much time over the course of a life spent going number one, weeing, whizzing, squirting, taking a leak, tinkling and just plain pissing (if you have to be vulgar about it) has taken its toll. I've had enough and I want to stop. The pipes are old and the routine is stale. It's a great inconvenience and a tremendous burden. I've done my part; I've contributed; I've given all I can give.

I just want it to end so I can enjoy the rest of my life in relative dryness and without the oppressing omnipresence of toilet tyranny.
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#2 Post by Mackasfour » 24 Jan 2010 14:51

Try doing it in 0 gravity whilst doing a handstand....
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#3 Post by Orodaran » 24 Jan 2010 17:43

NP: Frank Zappa - Why does it hurt when I pee
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End Of An Era
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#4 Post by End Of An Era » 24 Jan 2010 21:28

drink less.

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#5 Post by ThePKH » 24 Jan 2010 21:52

One word: catheter
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#6 Post by End Of An Era » 24 Jan 2010 22:09

shit, you win! :( mine was two words...

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#7 Post by Led Guardian » 25 Jan 2010 01:24

I usually find it pretty satisfying.
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#8 Post by Mackasfour » 25 Jan 2010 02:58

When I'm busting it's great :D
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#9 Post by Frozen within » 25 Jan 2010 16:16

Very few things are as satisfying to me as taking a massive leak on a sunday morning after too many goddamned beers. I wouldn't want to miss that at all.
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#10 Post by Andreas » 25 Jan 2010 20:46

I had a good one after I took the dog for a walk. I had to go before I even did the walking, but I held it back.

The feeling you get when you actually take a leak after waiting so long can only be described as maximum awesomeness...

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#11 Post by Orodaran » 25 Jan 2010 21:35

Yeah, I don't think women enjoy their pee so much as we men can do :P
"There's a time when a man needs to fight and a time when he needs to accept that his destiny's lost, the ship has sailed and that only a fool will continue. The truth is I've always been a fool"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A slight call afar is tempting me, like a whisper sweet or an awful scream; I cannot ignore what I've always been, I'm leaving again - one last time? in my little kingdom I can be what I really wanted to be... The wanderer

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#12 Post by Andreas » 25 Jan 2010 22:27

I could ask a few random women on the street if that's true :P

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#13 Post by Lilyael » 25 Jan 2010 22:28

well, if I may be allowed to butt in, I do find a good pee is quite satisfying, and allows me precious time away from my desk to mull over the finer points of plot and characterisation. It's amazing what comes to me during those few precious moments in the dunny.
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#14 Post by Andreas » 25 Jan 2010 22:39

One down, more to go!

As we say in Holland: one swallow doesn't make summer yet

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#15 Post by End Of An Era » 25 Jan 2010 23:27

i say there are basically three important physical reliefs: orgasm, peeing and taking a dump.

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#16 Post by Orodaran » 25 Jan 2010 23:44

...and sometimes a VERY GOOD peeing can beat a VERY BAD orgasm :mrgreen:
"There's a time when a man needs to fight and a time when he needs to accept that his destiny's lost, the ship has sailed and that only a fool will continue. The truth is I've always been a fool"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A slight call afar is tempting me, like a whisper sweet or an awful scream; I cannot ignore what I've always been, I'm leaving again - one last time? in my little kingdom I can be what I really wanted to be... The wanderer

----------------------
BG news (if you're lazy to check the site) :: You're on Facebook? Look at my photos from concerts, travels and more :: Oh, and since you're at it, check my photos also on 500px

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#17 Post by alleyesonazarath » 26 Jan 2010 03:30

Since most women don't care so much for peeing, maybe all men should share the joy by peeing on them.

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#18 Post by Mackasfour » 26 Jan 2010 05:02

^ Lol, that reminds me of Dave Chappelle's parody song. R Kelly's pee on you :P
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#19 Post by Andreas » 26 Jan 2010 07:53

Yeah... that one's genius :lol:

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#20 Post by Mackasfour » 26 Jan 2010 08:11

Best black comedian imo
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#21 Post by blind-man » 26 Jan 2010 10:57

I think I took the most reliefing piss of my life yesterday. I left work already feeling like going, but decided to wait until I got home. You know, taking a leak is always good, but nothing beats the satisfaction of doing it in your own toillet. The problem was that the traffic was just horrible. It took me an hour to get home. I thought my bladder was going to explode.
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#22 Post by Mackasfour » 26 Jan 2010 12:40

Traffic holdups make pissing pure bliss when you finally do get to your own toilet :D
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#23 Post by blind-man » 26 Jan 2010 16:05

Mackasfour wrote:Traffic holdups make pissing pure bliss when you finally do get to your own toilet :D
True, but the fun's over when it starts to fucking HURT! :D
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#24 Post by Metal Fan » 26 Jan 2010 19:07

Nothing's better then talking on the phone while peeing 8)
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#25 Post by alleyesonazarath » 27 Jan 2010 04:10

Well, crucify me for being a heretic, but I took the most relieving shit yesterday, after walking outside for an hour without having anywhere to go

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#26 Post by West Virginia Mule » 27 Jan 2010 06:21

alleyesonazarath wrote:I took the most relieving shit
This topic is not about that. You want a shit topic, start one yourself.
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#27 Post by t.a.j. » 27 Jan 2010 10:22

I'm going to pee now.
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#28 Post by Frozen within » 28 Jan 2010 11:38

well, piss off then :)
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#29 Post by Lilyael » 28 Jan 2010 22:10

since we're on the subject, can anyone of you lot tell me why men can't seem to get it all in the bog ? I mean, they drip all over the shop. Why !!?? I don't spray the walls when I go - or is that it, you see it as a prime opportunity to mark your territory ?? FFS
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#30 Post by End Of An Era » 28 Jan 2010 22:44

Lilyael wrote:since we're on the subject, can anyone of you lot tell me why men can't seem to get it all in the bog ? I mean, they drip all over the shop. Why !!?? I don't spray the walls when I go - or is that it, you see it as a prime opportunity to mark your territory ?? FFS
since we're on the subject, can any lady here tell me why women NEVER go to the toilet alone? I mean, us guys can compare stuff, but what the hell do women need to do that requires assistance?

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#31 Post by Lilyael » 28 Jan 2010 23:01

I go to the lav alone.
But when..ahem...ladies...go to the toilet together, it's not so one can help the other with her knickers ( because in my experience, they don't wear any ) - it's so they can gossip about this cute guy they've been ogling, or how that bitch in the corner is "asking for it"....etc.

I seem to remember having this discussion here before....?
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#32 Post by End Of An Era » 28 Jan 2010 23:02

i don't remember, it's because of my... ehm... what was it again?? :?

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#33 Post by Lilyael » 28 Jan 2010 23:06

it's because you're doing two things at once
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#34 Post by Metal Fan » 28 Jan 2010 23:51

I hate haveing some one else in the bathroom. 'specally when you feel like farting ^_^
⋨The Dagor Dagorath, the great final battle at which the forces of the brothers Manwë and Melkor will face one another, and Arda will be unmade.⋩
Is in with Bender on his plan
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#35 Post by End Of An Era » 29 Jan 2010 00:09

Metal Fan wrote:I hate haveing some one else in the bathroom. 'specally when you feel like farting ^_^
farting is the solution. the other person will want to get out of there after you fart :P

You know, farting when urinating is great. It emphasizes the whole act of peeing, like a statement. Farting while or after peeing is like an exclamation mark. There!! ha-ha!

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#36 Post by Sleeping Dragon » 29 Jan 2010 08:54

yeah, but no sneezing... sneezing while peeing puts you in a very short, split-second dilemma: should i stop peeing for the duration of the sneez or should i just risk it?
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#37 Post by Metal Fan » 31 Jan 2010 19:51

End Of An Era wrote:
Metal Fan wrote:I hate haveing some one else in the bathroom. 'specally when you feel like farting ^_^
farting is the solution. the other person will want to get out of there after you fart :P

You know, farting when urinating is great. It emphasizes the whole act of peeing, like a statement. Farting while or after peeing is like an exclamation mark. There!! ha-ha!

Answer to my problem. *farts*
⋨The Dagor Dagorath, the great final battle at which the forces of the brothers Manwë and Melkor will face one another, and Arda will be unmade.⋩
Is in with Bender on his plan
Blind Guardian wrote:A fairly small but absolutely bravehearted crowd in Tempe has made that a night remember. Marcus(on behalf of the band) says: Thank you:-)

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#38 Post by Credits » 14 Feb 2010 04:34

See, I drink a lot of water, so I have to urinate a lot. Goddamn does it get annoying. =|
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#39 Post by Metal Fan » 14 Feb 2010 18:55

Lol

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#40 Post by Lilyael » 17 Feb 2010 00:22

if you are bored at work and there's someone with a bladder problem, leave a tap running. We sued to do that to our art teacher. She'd leave the room to pee, and we'd all fuck off elsewhere.
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#41 Post by Metal Fan » 19 Feb 2010 08:07

All you would have to say is 'drip' and my friend would have to pee.
⋨The Dagor Dagorath, the great final battle at which the forces of the brothers Manwë and Melkor will face one another, and Arda will be unmade.⋩
Is in with Bender on his plan
Blind Guardian wrote:A fairly small but absolutely bravehearted crowd in Tempe has made that a night remember. Marcus(on behalf of the band) says: Thank you:-)

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#42 Post by NDS » 20 Feb 2010 14:54

I have to pee right now! :mrgreen:
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#43 Post by Andreas » 20 Feb 2010 17:33

Well go to the neighbour's front door then!

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Re: The thing about peeing...

#44 Post by West Virginia Mule » 10 Sep 2012 08:28

I pee more now than when I started this topic. These days, there's a little hidden "extra" that hides in clandestine fashion somewhere down the tube, biding its time. When I think the proceedings have concluded, it rushes out all gangbusters and tumbles down my leg and puddles in my slippers. When that happens I feel old and disgusting. When that doesn't happen, I still feel old and disgusting. Also, my pee smells like lime margaritas.
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Re: The thing about peeing...

#45 Post by Frozen within » 21 Sep 2012 19:08

I hate the after-cumming pee, especially when I've had a couple of beers. For one, the lack of control over the flow after climaxing is ever apparent, even without alcoholic beverages. But WITH alcohol it's mostly a weaksauce flow but with peaks at just those moments that I can't correct them. Man, it's just that I think that fucking and drinking is a match made in heaven which prevents me from making the wise decision of fucking sober only :(
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